i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize