He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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