My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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