Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Randomize