Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize