I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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