We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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