I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
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we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
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Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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