And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
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Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize