What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
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