I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize