I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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