he wants to bone in the snuggie
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
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but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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