Nicole vs. Life
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
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