After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize