I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Drunk is a universal language darling
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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