I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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