I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize