He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
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btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
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