He asked to "fluff my boner.."
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize