Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Randomize