i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
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