Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
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