ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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