am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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