this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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