Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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