Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He uses pillows to masturbate.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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