He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize