and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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