he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
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Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
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I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
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