We're like a lot better than the average bears
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
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