Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
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