before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize