After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Randomize