just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
My feet surprised me
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