dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
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you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
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