FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
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