There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I deserve this hangover.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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