thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
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This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
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Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
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