just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize