The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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