Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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