Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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