What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize