I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
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Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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