She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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