i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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