is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i think i have two assholes
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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