im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
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